Progress Report

So I'm sitting here at jury duty. Although the prospect of getting picked is not appealing, at least I'm getting some peaceful and quiet reading time in between the nerve-wracking assignment calls. Can you tell I'm not excited about jury duty? I thought I'd attempt to update my blog and see how far I get. 

Emma has been home for over six months now. She's adjusting well to her surroundings. She is picking up English very quickly, almost alarmingly quickly. I have to constantly ask her to speak Chinese with me. She has started to lose it, using a lot of "Chinglish." I will do my best to help her keep as much of her "Chinese voice," as Evan calls it, as possible. One good thing is that I'm no longer the sole focus of her chattiness. She now can spread it out to everyone, and exhaust them with her energy. 

She has been doing pretty well as school, picking things up very quickly. She's quite a smart cookie. A little too smart for her own good at times. Evan and Emma act like any brother and sister, bickering and tattling and fighting all the time. Being so close in age, they are essentially like twins. Even though we're keeping them a grade apart, Emma is surpassing Evan in some areas. it makes me a little worried for Evan. He's going to have to work harder for school. However, Evan has this natural endearing quality about him that, as hubby says, grows on you like a virus. I call the two of them "knuckleheads" because that's exactly what they are.

The bonding and attachment process continues. It takes a long while, at least for me. With Evan, I think it took over a year to feel like he was ours. At one point I thought it would never happen. Don't get me wrong, there are plenty of times when I get frustrated with him, but it feels more natural now to ruffle his hair or give him a hug than before. We are not quite there with Emma yet, but I know we will. I don't think our personalities naturally mesh. Some behaviors she exhibits which might have worked for her in the past really don't work so well with hubby and me. Particularly this 撒嬌 (sa-jiao) behavior that is common in little Chinese girls and even some grown women, drives me up the wall. There is no direct translation of the word in English. It's sort of a combination of being coy, caroling, pouty, coquettish, spoiled, etc, using an affected "cute/sweet" or sometimes whiney voice, basically to get what they want. Some people like this sort of "kissing-up" behavior, but I find it pretentious and it makes my skin crawl (好肉麻). Maybe it's because I grew up partly in the US, or maybe it's because being the youngest of six, any attempt or sign of "Sa-jiao" is quickly squashed by my sisters and brother. (You know who you are :o) ) And now I can't stand it myself. I really hope Emma grows out of it or at least learn to use it only where appropriate. It's not necessarily a bad thing. It's sort of a "people skill." 

It's going to take time to "reprogram" her. As she learns what we expect of her, we're also trying to learn how to best encourage as well as discipline her. It's an exhausting task. She likes to test her boundaries, especially at school. The teachers' hands are tied to a certain extent. They can't dish out corporal punishment like they used to when I was growing up (too bad). She is willfully defiant sometimes, then waits to see what you would do. As parents, all we can do is be consistent, not give in. I must admit that I am not the most patient person. In fact, Evan has been telling Emma not to bring out the "Hulk" in Mama... oops. I remind myself that she is constantly changing and growing. I know that everyday we spend together will bring us that much closer.